Popping Popcorn, mom baking bread. The sound of Dad’s Muzak. The sounds of my sons piano playing wafting through the house. Talking into the wee hours of night with my mom. Hearing my husband say “I have an idea!” And me so excited to hear what it is. the smell of Aquavelva and cigarettes. Hearing my dads on purpose scary laughter when we watched a scary movie. Diaryland (if you know you know). Skinny dipping with Elizabeth. The birth of our son. Playing jacks at Birdies. Nanna’s perfume – White Shoulder’s. Fighting with my siblings. (I miss that as a kid) My first independent plane ride. My first kiss. (I am talking about you Brian Taylor). the smell of bbq’s, suntan lotion, and lake water.
Category: College
It’s going to be OK
I just want to tell all of you parents with freshmen that are moving to the dorms – “ it’s going to be OK”
I promise you everything‘s going to work out. I really wish I had “ this is going to be OK wine to send to all of you”
This is a big deal and an intense and overwhelming experience for your students and for yourselves.
Many of you have never been apart from your kid and that can be anxiety producing, scary and overwhelming.
(I know it was for me)
But I promise even though some of them might become homesick, they will find their people and they will be OK.
I was told many times that I needed to trust the process and they were right.
The hardest part for me was not talking with, texting with or connecting with my kid every single day.
“ is he OK?”
“ is he eating OK?”
“ is he making new friends?”
“ is he homesick”
“ is he handling his classes OK?”
“ what if he hates his roommate?”
“ what if he goes downtown to Portland and there’s a riot”
“ what if he gets drunk?”
“ what if he gets Covid??”
Those were just a small pittance of questions that would run through my mind especially at night. I need to drive myself crazy with a worry.
I had to find my new normal and you will too – and because of Covid my kid was home for over a year to do online classes and now he’s moved out and back in the dorms full-time and I have to find my new normal all over again.
With your kid away at college The dynamics of your family will change.
It’s OK to be sad. It’s OK to not know what your purpose is . If you are an empty-nester now I feel you.
I myself am going through empty- nest syndrome and it sucks.
What I’m learning through therapy (oh yes hi I’m seeing a therapist every other week to talk about all the stuff) is that this whole separation/independence is how it supposed to work. And that we have all sacrificed and worked very very hard to get our kids to this point in life and we are successfully launching them.
So again I’m gonna tell you “ it’s going to be OK” all of the stuff is going work out.
I got you. ❤️
Take a deep breath and say it with me:
“ it’s going to be OK”
Pacific Northwest Empty Nester 